Good Morning!
My first challenge has already begun. There is a very long history with me and alcohol. It is single handed the worst thing I do to myself. My Mother and Father were both drinkers and smokers, they both died early, too early, both at the age of 49 my Mom passed 10 years ago and my Dad 5 and a half years ago. Both from smoking and drinking related disease. Even after these events it took me many years to quit smoking cigarettes, which has been 1 year and 10 months since I've (and my Rose) have quit. I never thought I could do it...my identity was completely wrapped up in a pack of smokes. I mean who am I if I'm not smoking??? What really influenced my decision was when my little brother started stealing my cigarettes, and I saw my influence on him creating for him a critical situation. So I quit, quite possibly the best thing I've ever done for myself to date!
My influence over my little brother is very strong and now that he lives with me I feel as though all my actions are under a microscope, he has a way of picking up the very worst of my habits! I wish he would pick up some of my compulsion for tidiness! But alas I see his interest in drinking coming to the forefront of his mind. This is not something I'm proud of, I do not wish to pass down an addiction to America's number 1 legal drug of choice! So I need to quit.
I have had stints of sobriety, the longest 8 months a few years ago. I am challenging myself to go a year without a drink. To a lot of people this would seem like no big deal, but quite honestly like the cigarettes I find my identity wrapped up in a six pack of Japanese beer mmmmm...Kirin! Who am I sober? Will my abstinence from alcohol be as influential as my actual drinking? Will he see the difference it creates in me? What will be the difference. Like I said for you casual drinkers this is no big deal, however for me a nightly tosser backer of some sort of spirits, this is frightening. Today is day 3 of sobriety. A year will end lets just make it easy and say Oct 1st will be a year.
This is the first in a long line of challenges I accept. Later I will add more, incorporate, and pile on top of each other. Keeping change flowing through me like river water, I will eventually strip myself of the very things I identify with the most.
Today I will begin research on my next challenge....FASTING.....sounds delicious doesn't it?
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1 comment:
Baby, I love your blog concept! You are a strong, brave tiger and I know you can do anything you put your mind to! What fun for me to walk beside you and join in some of your challenges--you certainly have joined in mine! Just imagine the bountiful harvest (literally and also figuratively) that awaits us this time next year...
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